Archive for category: Crime

Utah Makes Pornography Illegal With Fines & 30 Days In Jail For Offenders

Utah makes pornography illegal

SALT LAKE CITY (AP) — Utah Governor Gary Herbert signed a resolution declaring pornography “illegal” and a “public health crisis” at the Utah State Capitol today. “This is a historic day for the good, clean-living, people who call the state of Utah home,” Herbert told reporters. “This new law...

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Drug Kingpin ‘El Chapo’ Escapes From Mexican Prison Yet Again

El Chapo escapes again

Mexico City, Mexico — Early this morning, drug kingpin Joaquin ‘El Chapo’ Guzmán, head of the Sinaloa Cartel, escaped from the Altiplano maximum security prison once again. It is unclear at this point what exactly happened, but these are the details CBS News has received from Mexican officials so...

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Christian Anti-Masturbation’s Mascot “Fappy” Arrested For Public Masturbation While Swimming Naked With The Dolphins At Sea World In San Diego

Fappy arrested at Sea World in San Diego

San Diego, CA — In an ironic twist of a fate, a mascot for a Christian anti-masturbation group was arrested today for masturbating in public. The mascot, along with his organization, Stop Masturbation Now, recently finished a federally funded 31-city nationwide school tour which they claim focused on educating...

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This Country Needs To Raise The Minimum Wage Before It Is Too Late

Raise the minimum wage

Yesterday I had to get a couple things and the only store open was Walmart. Pretty disgusting forcing your employees to work on New Year’s Day. Also I felt pretty disgusting going to Walmart and supporting Walmart. When I was checking out I talked to the cashier for a...

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Christian Anti-Masturbation Mascot Sentenced To 8 Years For Public Masturbation

Fappy the Dolphin sentenced to eight years in prison

San Diego, CA — A mascot for a federally funded Christian anti-masturbation organization was sentenced to eight years in federal prison after being convicted of assault on a police officer, molesting a dolphin, and public masturbation. This was the fourth arrest for public  in three years for 37-year-old Paul...

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Phoenix Man Stops Robbery By Quoting Pulp Fiction

Pulp Fiction robbery

Phoenix, AZ — A local Phoenix man is a hero today after he single-handedly stopped a couple who were attempting to rob a coffee shop. His quick thinking saved the day according to restaurant manager Andy Steinberg. “He just started quoting movie lines from Pulp Fiction. The robbers kind...

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ISIS Denies Responsibility for San Bernardino Shooting

ISIS denies san bernardino shooting

San Bernardino, CA — Following the tragic attack in San Bernardino that left 14 people killed and another 21 wounded, ISIS’s Military Council has issued a statement denying any connection with the fatal shooting. The leader of the Military Council, Yasin Raheem, released this statement with CBS News: “ISIS had...

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Ben Carson Now Target of Cold Case Investigation After Claims of Violent Past

Ben Carson

Washington, D.C. – Presidential front runner Ben Carson has been criticized recently for various claims he has made ranging from the original uses of the Great Pyramids to his coulda-been-career at West Point. But his claims about his violent past and troubled youth may land him in serious legal...

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Copyright 2016 | All Rights Reserved | Powered by HITTEKK | Proudly owned by CBS News President & CEO, Dr. Paul Horner. We need writers! Contact us! Looking to advertise? Contact us! All trademarks, service marks, trade names, trade dress, product names, images and logos appearing on the site are the property of their respective owners. | Do you have a complaint? We love to hear them! You can call our complaint department directly at (785) 273-0325 | Do you have a problem with self-rape? Are you looking to get off the Devil's playground? Fappy The Anti-Masturbation Dolphin can help! Praise Fappy!

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